yaks for Jan 20

Shelby Tankersley

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  1. “My roommate’s diary says I have boundary issues.”

  2. “Walking out of class with icicles made out of tears running down my cheeks.”

  3. “Not sure if it’s a fire alarm or 2 girls seeing each other for the first time since last semester.”

  4. “Will the bookstore accept a kidney as a form of payment?”

  5. “When your touch ID won’t work so you have to unlock your phone like a muggle.”

  6. “How to terrify your roommate in three words: ‘where’s our toothbrush?’”

  7. “I saw the hottest girl ever on campus today… then I realized I was walking past a mirror.”

  8. “I would like to thank everyone buying Powerball tickets and contributing to the overall jackpot I’ll be winning.”

  9. “My ex told me he is still in love with me… I told him I don’t blame him.”

  10. “Today, my professor began class with ‘I may have accidentally overdosed, so if I pass out you guys can leave, just don’t step on me.’”