Dear South Found Bathrooms,
You will not be missed.
With the upcoming renovations to the beloved South Foundation Hall, it seems our days together are numbered. I will cherish every trip I take to...
Listen, my horny readers, I know what you freaks like. I see you all the time getting cuddled up in the most strange places. Whether it be the Oakland Center, the hallways of Varner or your cars, you people...
After the attendance of a different anti-abortion group on Oakland University’s campus last week, a new anti-abortion group came to campus to spread their message in a completely different way. The spokesman...
I hate you.
You know who you are. It’s the guy with the jacked up headlights on his shitty 2000 F-150.
I don’t understand the need to want to blind every driver passing you so you can see a little...
Lady Gaga once said, “Boys, boys, boys.”
As a straight, young woman in her prime dating days, I have developed a love/hate relationship with the male species. They’re so cute, but so stupid sometimes....
Don’t run stop signs, silly
Two Oakland University police officers were on patrol on the night of Aug. 20 when they observed a black Buick run the stop sign on west Oakland Drive. The black Buick...
It is a sad day in this great country of ours when another public space bars me from displaying my beautiful firearm openly for all to see. Today, the source of my insufferable sadness is Meijer. The store...
Katie LaDuke, Managing Editor
• September 11, 2019
The birds work for the bourgeoisie.
There. I said it. If there are any fellow TikTokers out there, you know what I’m talking about.
This isn’t a game though. Birds are not real. Maybe Reagan did...
The other night, I was going through my CDs … Yes, I still have those thin, circular, holographic things that no longer go in cars or anywhere, frankly, unless you have a Walkman — if one of you asks...
Hello, my friends. One thing has come to my attention throughout my two years of college: I'm getting fatter.
So, with this being my new reality, I need to start dieting. I have recently discovered...
After two seasons that fell short of the goal — a Horizon League title — both the men’s and women’s basketball teams have retooled and are reloaded for the 2019-2020 season.
Both teams face off...
Ah, Michigan. The state with two seasons: winter and construction. I know it’s been said time and time again, but it seems every construction season gets even messier and more chaotic than the year before.
While...
