Caterina Passarelli

During a recent episode of MTV’s “The Hills” reality show, character Spencer Pratt is interrogating his girlfriend Heidi’s ex-boyfriend, Colby, about his decision to remain a virgin until marriage. To Pratt this was like “hanging out with an alien.” The idea that an earthquake could occur and Colby would die a virgin is the craziest thought in Pratt’s mind. He asked, “Are there a lot of you out there?”

I think this is the wrong message to send out to viewers, especially younger ones who are currently facing these types of decisions. Virgins are not another species or foreign creatures; they are human beings just like you and me. Should virgins walk around with scarlet letters on their chests so we don’t associate ourselves with these so-called “aliens”?

Remaining a virgin or not depends on the individual and his or her outlook on life, marriage and religion. It shouldn’t be something that people judge you for or look down upon. This decision should not define a person’s character.

After watching the episode, I decided to talk to some of my fellow students to see where they stood on the matter, and opinions were mixed. One girl explained that she’s met her share of “Spencers” throughout high school and college, and her decision to remain a virgin has ended multiple relationships.

Sex is now in your face with increased media coverage at all times, from “morning after pill” commercials to billboards for condoms. It’s sad that there’s so much pressure on virgins to have sex in order to fit what has become socially acceptable. But love can be expressed in many different ways, not just by having sex.

“I think that in the teenage years there is more social pressure through the media’s exposure and from peers to have sex or to lie and say you have,” senior Pamela Gudenau said.

On the other side of the fence is the fact that virgins are judging their non-virgins peers for having sex.

“I strongly believe in the thought of ‘to each their own.’ If you want to wait then wait, if you want to have sex then have sex. But what upsets me is when the people who are ‘waiting’ negatively judge the ones who have sex,” senior Chris Hagan said.

The question isn’t whether someone is a virgin or not. There is no right answer or right way to look at the situation – everyone has an opinion. What’s important is to be respectful and treat everyone equally, and this goes for both sides. Just because someone has differing viewpoints does not make him alien and it does not place you above him.