On second thought: Do you see that girl? Dibs

By Daud Yar

As you walk to the Oakland Center, an awkward yell suddenly comes from outside South Foundation Hall, echoed by laughter and obnoxious cursing. That’s right; you’ve just been called … by the loudest bidder.

As kids, most of us found a sense of ownership by uttering a single word: Dibs. Now, as we age into our middle twenties, that word takes on a whole new meaning.

According to Urban Dictionary, dibs is “the game played by young gentlemen in which you call ‘dibs’ on any young lady that takes your fancy.”

The official rules are simple: Only five ‘dibs’ per outing and once a girl has been dibbed, she is off limits to other players barring any unorthodox maneuvers. Note that some play with looser rules than others.

So, have at it. It’s OK to be a little juvenile now because after graduation, there aren’t a lot opportunities to dib in an office or around the water cooler.

Of course, you may be asking yourself: “Does this approach work?” The short answer is an emphatic no. Come on. If it were that easy, no guy would be single as our campus boasts a 3:2 ratio of women to men.

There have been documented cases, however, when the dibbed individual is so flattered and complimented by the gesture that there is no stopping a girl from giving out a phone number.

On second thought…

The game is completely sexist.

Why is it that only a man can dib and a woman can only be dibbed? We need to expand and/or add to these limiting rules.

Who is to say the roles can’t flip-flop? Women have an equal right to dib as men. Or, in our ever increasing open society, men can dib men and women can dib women.

The rules should be amended ASAP. We men wouldn’t mind the occasional “dibs” yell on our stroll toward the Oakland Center. At the same time, future couples could save some time skipping that first phase of a relationship when neither person knows what the hell is going on.

Dibs: A game for those who are not shy or do not give a damn about their image.

Is it obnoxious and clearly unnecessary? Yes. But it sure is fun.

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