Phoebe Bridgers & Paul Mescal: A thirst tweet turned love story

Mescal+and+Bridgers+sporting+said+micro+mullet+and+picnic+blanket+at+the+2021+LACMA+Art+%2B+Film+Gala.

Photo courtesy of Today

Mescal and Bridgers sporting said micro mullet and picnic blanket at the 2021 LACMA Art + Film Gala.

At a time where Elon Musk’s leadership continues to propel Twitter impossibly further into a nosedive, the news that singer songwriter Phoebe Bridgers and actor Paul Mescal are reportedly engaged gives us good reason to reflect fondly on the good ole days of this decaying hellsite.

The rumored engagement is not only beautiful news from the perspective of those with a parasocial connection to Bridgers after religiously interpreting her lyrics for years (a description which does not at all fit anyone behind this here keyboard), it also resembles a win for all the thirst tweeters out there embarrassing themselves on main for a long shot at their favorite celebrity. 

Confused? Not as terminally online as the two authors of this article? Allow us to catch you up.

May 12, 2020: Mescal replied to what we have to imagine has gone down as one of his favorite reviews of his Hulu series “Normal People,” a short but thoroughly candid tweet from Bridgers which read, “Finished Normal People and now I’m sad and [redacted] oh wait.” 

May 23, 2020: Bridgers and Mescal interview each other over Instagram live for Wonderland Magazine, after appearing on alternative covers of the same issue.

July 2020: Bridgers and Mescal were reportedly spotted out galavanting together through the latter’s home country of Ireland — with the only evidence compiling to a select few tweets of Irish mams being all, “Saw ole Paul Mescal with an artsy girl in the pub xx.”

Nov. 28, 2020: Mescal confirms he’s in a relationship to GQ magazine (but with whom, Paul?!)

Dec. 8, 2020: Mescal stars in the music video for Bridgers’ song “Savior Complex.” Does that mean…?

Nov. 6, 2021: Oh yeah, it does mean. The pair make their red carpet debut, seemingly confirming their relationship. We’ve never seen a micro mullet and picnic blanket look this good!

Dec. 10, 2021: Instagram official, baby.

Two years and some months after that original tweet and here we are with a reported engagement (which, after The 1975 frontman Matty Healy’s accidental reveal on Twitter last month, we’re pretty confident is fact.)

It’s difficult to say what exactly set this ship asail where so many other flirtatious social media exchanges wind up sinking. Perhaps Bridgers caught wind early on that Mescal was prepared to strap her pug to his hip on her world tour and had no choice but to mastermind Taylor Swift-style to snag the best dog sitter.

Now, don’t get your hopes up too quickly. The simple act of being a celebrity and sending a targeted thirst tweet will not guarantee your success. See Doja Cat’s blunder with a newly famous Eddie from Stranger Things — you don’t want to end up with headlines like “Doja Cat Regrets Asking a 17-Year-Old to Play Wingman,” but I digress.

If at any point Bridgers and Mescal feel like writing the book on how to take your crushes on Twitter mutuals from the timeline to the altar (or at least confirming their engagement to give us some validation for writing this article), we’re waiting like a dog with a bird at their door (which reads super creepy if you haven’t heard Bridgers’s “Moon Song,” but also, if you haven’t heard “Moon Song,” who are you to judge?)