Republican party, are you good?

Autumn Page, Staff Reporter

Autumn was simply browsing the news one morning when she noticed her news feed was extra depressing and chaotic. Republican party members bombarded her news feed, and she thought to herself, “are they okay?”

I’m not one to judge, most of the time, but the headlines I was reading really made me scratch my head in wonder. 

We’ll start with Cindy McCain, widow of 2008 Republican presidential nominee John McCain. 

She did an interview with People and said, “we have got to overcome this [Doland Trump’s acquittal]. Our party’s dead if we don’t.” 

This sounds a little dramatic because the Republican and Democratic party have been around for a long time. It would take a lot more than a president getting voted for impeachment twice to get rid of the party. 

Also, some Republicans seem pretty extreme right now, willing to leave the Republican party for a new party led by Trump? 

One thing you can’t say about us liberals is that we never considered leaving our centuries-old party because of a president creating their own party.

This seems very impulsive, good for Republicans, but also I promise there will be another Republican president, chill out. 

Another reason I ask if Republicans are okay is because I saw at least four articles about the 2024 election, specifically, about Trump running for the 2024 election. 

It’s the third month of 2021, I understand the eagerness because of COVID-19 and the past year.

Republicans really want to deal with Generation Z again by trying to get Trump in the presidency again?

To clarify, Gen Z is the generation that ‘doesn’t’ care about their well-being and safety. We are the generation that ‘ate Tide-Pods’ and ‘sucked our lips on shot glasses’ for free Kylie Jenner lips. 

Republicans really want to test us AGAIN? 

I only have a few more things, dear readers, that are a part of the Republican party, to comment on to make sure you all are okay.

Anyone who claims to like and understand Eric Trump — this is for you.

How are President Joe Biden’s policies to blame for the weather in Texas?

I’ll patiently wait for the answer to that. If you read that sentence and thought to yourself, “Autumn, you’re simply wrong. No way would he say that.”

Well, dear reader, he did. During an interview with Fox News he really said:

“I think every single day, Biden makes people miss Donald Trump more. When you see some of these policies that are literally destroying jobs, that are destroying industries, that are causing Texas to freeze, that are cutting off our power to our energy grids and all these other nonsensical policies.”

I don’t think I can give a logical reason why he said this, and I further ask if the Republicans are okay?

Are Republicans eating enough vegetables and thinking logically, questioning everything you all hear? 

Let me know at [email protected], and I’ll stroke my ego.