I am doing something new this week. The 74th Primetime Emmy Awards took place last Monday, Sept. 12, and while I would usually pivot any coverage of an event like this to a fashion review in order to avoid having to form actual opinions of substance on the content being honored, this week will be different. 

I actually have things to say, and while I didn’t actually watch the Emmys this year, I can guarantee you that my Twitter feed is more comprehensive than most modern media. 

I would like to start with discussing “Abbott Elementary,” because I think that Quinta Brunson has single handedly revived the iconic mockumentary sitcom genre. I was so happy to see that Brunson won the Emmy award for Best Writing in a Comedy Series for “Abbott Elementary,” because that was truly my only Emmy’s wish.

I remember Brunson from her Buzzfeed days, so seeing her receive such well deserved praise felt so gratifying.

Sheryl Lee Ralph also won Best Supporting Actress in a Comedy for “Abbott Elementary,” opening up her acceptance speech with a rendition of Dianne Reeves’ song “Endangered Species” in probably one of the most tear jerking moments of the night. 

Zendaya took home the Emmy for Outstanding Lead Actress in a Drama for “Euphoria,” making her the youngest two-time Emmy winner in history at 26 years old. She is literally unstoppable.

Lizzo also took home an Emmy for Outstanding Competition Program for “Lizzo’s Watch Out for the Big Grrrls,” and is now halfway to EGOT status.

Another series that I was hoping would get some recognition was “The White Lotus,” and my wish did come true — even though it does feel like the show came out a long time ago. Nonetheless, I will still celebrate — I think that’s just the pandemic talking.

“The White Lotus” won the Emmy for Best Limited or Anthology series, which reminded me that season two is coming very soon with a whole new and exciting ensemble cast, as only Jennifer Coolidge is reprising her iconic role.

Coolidge also won Best Supporting Actress in a Limited or Anthology Series or Movie — I know these titles are long — for her role in “The White Lotus,” dancing to the music they started playing to cue her off stage post-acceptance speech. An icon.

Finally, the only man who deserves to be mentioned in this review is Matthew Macfadyen — also known as Mr. Darcy from “Pride and Prejudice.”

Mr. Darcy took home the Emmy award for Best Supporting Actor in a Drama Series for his very different role in “Succession,” the only member of the cast to take home an acting award that night in a fittingly ironic Tom Wambsgans move.

There you have it — my attempt at substance, but really just pop culture references.