Train selfie gone awry

As students, it is important we keep ourselves informed. We must keep up with the latest in all forthcoming news to stay ahead of the game. As such, keep the vital things in mind, like gender equality in Saudi Arabia, the growing death tolls in Iraq, the invasion of Ukraine, and this:

Some people may say this is what the culmination of all human advancements and technology was leading towards. I myself would say that.

The selfie train (har har) that is currently taking the world by storm has led up to this video being released so I could make that pun. Why do people love taking gratuitous pictures of themselves? Why do people do so in front of moving trains?

One of the most embarrassing moments a person can have is being caught mid-selfie. The judgment of the eyes press onto that poor fellow who can only put his phone away in shame. Maybe that person thought his eyelash game was too trendy to not be photographed. Maybe he thought his hair game was on point. The world may never know.

However, Mr. Train Selfie, who also goes by his alias Jared Frank, has allowed his shame to shower the world. But at the same time, he is making $250,000 off this video, so really, who is the one laughing here?

Still me.

Frank’s situation puts him in on odd position. He is desecrating the sacred notion of selfie-taking by raking in the big bucks. On the other hand, he probably does not care about the embarrassment if he is making that kind of money.

However, with this new viral epidemic, many may try to follow suit. If anyone has heard of the selfie Olympics, well, this is the next stage.

Prepare, everyone. All aboard the train.