Despite that harrowing tale which began the downward spiral that is my love life, it was a social learning experience necessary to the growth of a malleable human brain. It perturbs me that school kids these days are facing banishment from institutions for multitudes of measly incidents.
The phrase, “utterly useless and makes me question the competence of my (apparently) criminally moronic species” is thrown around a lot these days. It fits best, however, in a rant about the ridiculous things that can be found for sale on the Internet and what it says about the future of our kind.
The end is almost here. The finish line is just in reach. All that is left are these dreaded finals.
With so much on the plates of Golden Grizzlies this month, we understand the relentless need to relieve some stress. Well, most likely after finals are over, but we’d like to think you’ll get to some comic relief remedies sooner than later.
I find it slightly unnerving that the month of April has been tagged “Stress Awareness Month,” yet I have to hurdle over tufts of hair students have ripped out of their scalps studying tediously.
There have only been a handful of commercials in the last few years that successfully told us, the consumer, what the product was about memorably and that didn’t bother/annoy/lie to us.
I would flush a toilet 600 million times. I would invest in a multimedia department for The Oakland Post that actually did its job. I would buy my place of employment and immediately close it. I would pay to have your vocal chords ripped out if you utter that question to me once more.
Ah, it’s that time of the year again. The time for warm weather, bright sunshine, relaxing days on the beaches of Mexico, and fun-filled nights at their bars. I’m sure you all know what I’m talking about: Spring Break. Where and when else can an 18-year-old get straight-up obliterated other than in Mexico on Spring Break? Only one problem. Traveling there sucks.
If the cries of rapture are true and these are the last nights on Earth, these are some of the most sought-after activities on our bucket list.
Oakland University is electric. Students scuttling across campus in sandals and shorts, Frisbees flying across rolling green lawns, hammock-seated scholars swaying in the breeze, unicyclists speeding over the Beer Lake bridge.
